Tommy, an only child, smiled politely at the mention of his 51 blue and 3 red ribbons from the State Fair. He confidently spoke a phrase in Latin (one of the seven languages he spoke fluently) which I did not understand. A homeschooling mother interrupted him and "yes," he replied, "I would be glad to tutor your sons in physics and calculus. Oh! No charge! I just want to serve your family."
A lump rose in my throat. If only I had just one child to focus on, to plan studies for, to buy curriculum for. Were my girls missing out because I keep having babies (preceded by difficult pregnancies)? Was it selfish for me to want a big family?
It’s true. There are things my children will miss out on due to our family size, annual income and my limited abilities. But I believe in God's sovereignty. "From one man He made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and He determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. God did this so that men would seek Him and perhaps reach out for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us" (Acts 17:26-27). He chose to put my children in our home for a reason and Mike and I are the parents they need to become what God has called them to be.
Large families are a blessing! Children are a gift and a reward. In a large family, members can learn to serve, love, protect and sacrifice for one another. Every person in our family has different strengths and weaknesses that bless or build character in all the other members. Large families are fun! There is lots of laughter in our home. And there is always someone to play with. We are so thankful for our children, God's blessing!
On the other end of the spectrum, I can look at families much larger than mine and wish I had a bigger family with more children. Again, I need to rest in God's love. He gave me the exact amount of children He wanted me to have.
Speaking of trusting God, maybe you are fine with your family size, but struggle with yourself as a Mom.
Wouldn't your children do better with a better Mom? A mom who laughs more? A mom who is more serious? A mom who is more organized? Smarter? Wiser? Less angry? More affectionate? More affirming?
Again, God chose you to be the Mom of your children. He didn't make a mistake.
None of us are perfect. We all struggle and fail. Yet, we are loved by our Heavenly Father so intensely. His love never fails. His grace covers our flaws. His love is in our hearts by the Holy Spirit. If we surrender to Him, He can love through us.
So much of life is trusting that God withholds no good things from His Beloved children. As we think about our family size and abilities as a mother, wife, and friend, it's time to focus on the positive and not stir up doubts in our hearts. Ultimately, we love our family size because it's God's choice for us. Likewise, we trust that we are the perfect Mom for our children. Life is all about trusting Jesus.
Be blessed today....and every day....in every way!